What Does It Take to Be a Surrogate?

Embarking on the journey of becoming a surrogate mother is a noble and life-changing decision. It’s a path filled with compassion, support, and the joy of helping others build their families. In this guide, we’ll break down the essentials of what it takes to be a surrogate mother.

Determine if Surrogacy is Right for You

Simply put, surrogacy is when a woman, the surrogate, carries a baby for another person or couple who, for various reasons, can’t do it themselves.

Surrogacy is not just a physical commitment; it’s an emotional one too. Surrogates must be emotionally prepared for the journey ahead, understanding the bond they’ll form with the prospective parents and the baby. Support from family and friends is crucial during this time.

Here are five questions to ask yourself that can help you determine whether you are ready to be a surrogate:

  1. Are you healthy enough for surrogacy?
  2. Are you prepared to commit to the surrogacy process?
  3. Why do you want to be a surrogate?
  4. What type of surrogate do you want to be? Traditional or gestational?
  5. Do you meet surrogate requirements?

If you are seriously considering being a surrogate in the United States or in Canada, being well prepared is the key.

Basic Surrogacy Qualifications

Being a surrogate involves meeting certain criteria. While surrogacy requirements may vary, typical qualifications include:

  • Age: Typically, surrogates are between 21 and 40 years old.
  • Health: Good physical and mental health is essential for a successful surrogacy journey.
  • Prior Pregnancies: You should have successfully carried at least one pregnancy to term and no major complications in previous pregnancies.
  • Lifestyle: A stable, non-smoking, drug-free lifestyle is generally required.

The following video will give you more information about the surrogate mother requirements and qualifications.

Searching for Intended Parents

One of the most important decisions in your surrogacy journey is finding the right intended parents. Surrogacy is not just a transaction; it’s a unique and meaningful connection between the surrogate and the intended parents. Many surrogates find great joy in forming lasting relationships with the families they help create.

Before matching, meeting your intended parents (and their family, in person is essential. E-mail, WhatsApp, Skype, or telephone communication may not always be truthful. So it’s crucial to arrange a meeting before making a final decision.

It’s also good to consider the kind of relationship you would like to have with your intended parents and how much contact you would like to have with them during the pregnancy and after birth.

Legal Considerations

Surrogacy involves legal aspects to protect both the surrogate and the intended parents. Here are some key legal considerations:

  1. Surrogacy Agreements: A surrogacy contract outlines the expectations, responsibilities, and compensation details between the surrogate and the intended parents. This agreement serves as a foundation for the surrogacy journey. Before any medical procedures commence, it’s imperative to have a surrogacy agreement in place.
  2. Parental Rights: Establishing parental rights is a critical aspect of surrogacy law. The legal framework ensures that the intended parents are recognized as the legal parents once the baby is born. This step is essential for a smooth transition of parental rights from the surrogate to the intended parents.
  3. Legal Consultation: Before diving into the medical procedures of surrogacy, it’s strongly recommended to seek legal advice from a reputable local lawyer specializing in reproductive law and surrogacy regulation. Th

The legal aspects of surrogacy are crucial. Before starting the process, consulting with a legal expert ensures a clear understanding of the laws and regulations, making your surrogacy journey legally secure.

being a surrogate mother

Medical Stages

Screening and Background Checks

Before becoming a surrogate, you’ll undergo thorough screening and background checks. This ensures that you meet the necessary criteria for surrogacy.

Getting Pregnant

The next step involves medical procedures to help you become pregnant. The fertility procedure may vary depending on the type of surrogacy you’re pursuing, whether it’s traditional or gestational. In traditional surrogacy, you might use your own egg, while in gestational surrogacy, you’ll carry an embryo created with the intended parents’ or donors’ genetic material. Commonly, this involves In Vitro Fertilization (IVF), where an egg is fertilized with sperm outside the body, followed by the implantation of the fertilized egg into your uterus.


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Financial Compensation

The surrogacy journey demands time, effort, and dedication from the surrogate. Typically, surrogates receive financial compensation to appreciate this commitment. This compensation typically includes reimbursing various expenses, covering medical expenditures, travel costs, and other related economic considerations. It’s important to note that surrogacy compensation can vary based on the surrogate motivations (altruistic vs compensated surrogacy) and the country’s regulations (not all countries allow commercial surrogacy).

Time Frame

It would help if you thought about the timing of your surrogacy experience. Are you ready to commit a year or longer to the prospective parents you choose to help? When do you want to start? Set up your time frames clearly before entering any surrogacy arrangement.

Surrogacy will change your life as well as that of the intended parents you help, so take a deep breath, remain patient, and ensure you consider all the points in the Six-Point checklist.


Deciding to become a surrogate is a profound decision. It goes beyond a physical commitment; it is an emotional journey filled with compassion, support, and the joy of assisting others in building their families.

Suppose you are thinking that surrogacy is the right option for you. In that case, you have an opportunity to change the lives of a family, join our surrogacy community, and learn more about what a surrogate mother is and how to become a surrogate mother.

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Written by David
I work daily to make surrogacy available to as many intended parents, surrogate mothers and egg donors around the world as possible.
1 Comment
  1. I am so much interested in becoming a surrogate because am through giving birth and I would like to help people who are struggling with carrying babies

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