What to Expect after a Failed IVF?

Finding out that IVF treatment has not worked can understandably be heartbreaking. It is natural to be disappointed when things don’t work out, even if you tried to temper your hopes beforehand.

There are too many natural variables to point to a cause. Even in the best of circumstances, PGS/PGD testing, perfect embryos, lining, etc., some transfers can still fail.

What Are the Most Common Reasons for IVF failure?

Low-quality eggs: The quality of the eggs plays a crucial role in IVF success. Poor-quality eggs may result in unsuccessful fertilization or embryo development.

Factors related to age: As a woman gets older, the quantity and quality of the eggs gradually deteriorate. Using donor eggs can increase the chances of successful IVF for older women.

Ovarian responses: In some cases, a woman’s ovaries may not respond to IVF medication as expected, thus failing to produce enough eggs or poor-quality eggs.

Chromosomal abnormalities: Without proper genetic testing of embryos, chromosomal abnormalities may go undetected, causing miscarriages.

Uterine issues: Conditions like uterine abnormalities, fibroids, polyps, or scarring may impact implantation.

How Do You Deal with IVF Failure?

After a failed transfer, it is normal to feel disappointed and sad. Take a break and give yourself some days before you decide what to do next. Here are some tips:

Do not blame yourself

When fertility treatment fails, try not to blame yourself or your surrogate. Blaming yourself by looking back at everything you did or did not do over the past few years or months will not help you process the disappointment healthily. Punishing yourself through self-blame will achieve nothing other than causing you further distress.

Take some time to grieve

It is essential to take some time to realize and accept it.

Unsuccessful fertility treatment cycles can be distressing because they cause feelings of loss, emptiness, and sadness that come from exploring a future that you had planned out differently. You have every right to feel devastated after undergoing embryo transfer.

Consider attending counseling

If you find that you are struggling with the experience and you need support from someone other than your partner, family members, and friends, consider attending some professional counseling.

The process has been proven effective in helping people overcome difficulties in their personal lives, and it can help you move forward from the distress that accompanies failed IVF treatment cycles.

After IFV Fails… What is Next?

In IVF Surrogacy, after a failed transfer, both parties (surrogate mother and intended parents) are going to be devastated. Still, unless you have a personal or medical reason to stop the relationship with your surrogate mother or your intended parents, you should consider trying again.

Once you have allowed yourself some time, it is necessary to schedule a meeting with your fertility specialist to discuss your options and next steps.

Also, remember there is no guarantee that you’ll be at your goal any sooner. Therefore, a good approach that can allow you to keep calm is:

  • Hope to have a pregnancy going within a specific time frame (6 or 8 months) rather than after each transfer.
  • Keep your transfer date secret; for example, don’t tell your friends and family that a transfer is taking place. Telling all your entourage puts a lot of pressure on you, and telling everyone that it didn’t work out is difficult.

How soon after failed IVF can you try again?

Usually, you only need to wait until the next period starts with medication. However, some doctors may recommend waiting a few months between transfers to let the surrogate body heal. Even if tests show her body is ready, the surrogate’s mind/body may not be ready to go into a new procedure right away.


Fertility treatment can be extremely tough. It is not possible to guarantee successful fertility treatment because of the many factors involved, some of which are beyond your control. You can use the written experiences documented by other parents and professionals to find out more about IVF treatments and how to improve your chances of success in the delicate process. Find more information from community members to be better informed on IVF treatment cycles.

You’ll get there, no worries. You have to be patient and positive!

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Written by David
I work daily to make surrogacy available to as many intended parents, surrogate mothers and egg donors around the world as possible.

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